Liar, Liar

So I said I would post another blog when I got home. Then I lied and didn't. Oops! I got home and went on the treadmill and then made dinner. Then Tom's brother called and told him he doesn't think he's coming to our wedding (wtf) and by that point I wasn't in the mood to do anything but go to bed.

So Tom has two brothers. One lives in Texas and one lives about 2 hours away. The one in Texas has a wife nobody can stand. She refuses to leave her 2 year old child with her own grandma for 5 days to attend our wedding. Which I guess is fine since I don't like her anyway. Tom's brother (her husband) will come alone. Tom's other brother is single and I guess is having a hard time coming up with the money to go. Which I know is true, his hours at work got cut back. HOWEVER, Tom's dad gave each kid $5k for xmas and we told him he NEEDS to save 1k for this trip. (We weren't officially engaged yet. But we knew we were going to have a wedding in Jamaica already.) So I don't know what happened but now he says he cant go. So do we pay his trip? We can't really afford to. (And that wouldn't be fair.) But I feel bad that Tom won't have one of his brothers there!!! Tom claims he's fine with it. Obviously he wants his brother there, but he gave him fair warning and if he can't afford it, no hard feelings. I asked Tom if his dad might help pay for his brother and he said, "highly doubtful." I don't know what to do with that whole mess. I choose to ignore it for now!

Last night was spent trying on tons of clothes. Our photographer that is going to do our engagement pictures said she is free on Sunday and we need to hurry if we want pictures with snow. So I had to run out and get some clothes. I got myself a simple grey cardigan with a purple lace tank under it and Tom a dark grey sweater. Tonight we have to go get some new shoes, a necklace, and maybe some new nail polish for those close-up ring shots!

Saturday will be spent cleaning the house because we are having 8 people over for dinner and some cards.

Sunday is the above mentioned engagement pictures. (I hope I don't look FAT in all of them!)

Feeling Better

I'm back! And feeling a lot better! The past couple months have been hard in sooooo many ways...but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel! I have tons to update you all on, but I don't seem to have the time right now (at work) so I will have to do another post tonight when I get home.

I will do a quick update on the weight loss thing. Still no change in my weight. I'm stuck at 143. However, the past 2 weeks I have been pretty darn good with my eating (and tracking calories) and since I'm feeling better I've been starting to workout again too. I'm getting pretty upset that the scale won't move, to be honest. I would be THRILLED to even see 142 on the damn scale! ha! I'm not giving up and I'm still plugging along, but I want to see some progress! (and no, my clothes still fit the same...no change there either)

Last Saturday I went to the prior fat girl meet up. It was nice to be around 40 women all from the Minneapolis area who are struggling with the same issues as me. However, I did feel really out of place. I'm really shy in person and it's hard to open up. But it was nice to meet Jen of priorfatgirl.com (she's super nice!) and I got some nice samples and coupons too!

Anyway, I'll be back later (and with some wedding updates!)

sick sick sick sick

I have been sick for the past week. Really sick. As in, I look like death and can't do anything but lay in bed. :( Then last night Emma (my little yorkie-poo) started throwing up every 5 minutes and was whining and shaking. After an hour I decided to bring her to the emergency vet because she wouldn't stop throwing up. $400 later everything checked out and they gave her fluids and some meds to stop the vomiting. She seemed fine this morning. There goes all the money I have saved for the wedding so far. Ugh!

(Oh! As a side note I have lost a couple pounds since being sick. One good thing about being sick, right? Ha!)

I wrote earlier about a blogger meetup for girls who are trying to lose weight/or have lost weight. And I officially signed up and it's this Saturday at a local coffee shop! I'm nervous, but excited too. It should be fun!

Happy Birthday, Rex!

My little man Rex is one today! (Is it wrong that I'm kinda sad that he's no longer a puppy anymore? I'm going to be a mess when I have actual children!)

Here he is shortly after we got him last May (Around 3 pounds)

And Rex at our housewarming party (Around 8 pounds. He grew into his ears, haha!)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY REX!

Tonight Tom and I are going out to dinner to celebrate Valentine's day. I'm excited! I got him a Jack Daniels sign (he collects them) and some new swim trunks for a gift. (His old ones got torn last summer and I figure he will need them for JAMAICA!) Then tomorrow we have our bowling league and then Sunday we are celebrating my great-grandma's 95th birthday!

And on the weight related note, still at 143.0 UGH. Some weeks I know why I stayed the same, because I wasn't as strict as I needed. But this week, I stayed within my calories EVERY day, I worked out. I did everything right. And still no loss. Frustrating.

4 years ago

4 years ago I was at rock bottom. The man I was desperately in love with (and living with!) told me he was still in love with his ex girlfriend. (It is also when I gained the weight I have been working so hard at getting rid of.) He was seeing her behind my back while I was at work. He didn't have the balls to actually end things with me because he claimed he was confused and wasn't sure which woman he wanted. On Valentines day I asked if we could sit down and have dinner together and talk about everything that was going on. He agreed. I came home from work with a present for him and he informed me he was going to his ex's house to watch the Olympics with them instead. That was the final straw for me (why it took me that long, I don't know. This had been going on for about 4 weeks by that point.) I remember watching the Olympics on tv, alone, on Valentines day and picturing him at her house snuggled up to her. I don't remember much else except crying so much I couldn't catch my breath. It was the worst day of my entire life so far. It is now 4 years later and the winter Olympics are coming on again. I can't watch them. Even the previews make me sick to my stomach.

However, I can't believe the changes from 4 years ago to now. It's incredible. I'm so thankful! I just wish I could go back in time and tell myself, "Hey! Cheer up! 4 years from now you will own your own home and be engaged to a man who actually values you!" Maybe it wouldn't have hurt so much then. And maybe I would actually be able to watch the Olympics... It's days like this that remind me, "Everything happens for a reason." :)

I'm very lucky.

Prior fat girl

There is this blog I read daily, priorfatgirl.com. It's written by a girl named Jen who has lost 100 pounds. It's a great blog and she is actually from Minneapolis, like me. :) So I was very excited when she announced a meet up!

Info Here

And I took the plunge and signed up! It's for prior fat girls (I guess that would be me...Even though I don't quite feel like it yet) and "future" prior fat girls. I'm super nervous, like I'm going on a blind date or something! Ha! I've never met anyone from a blog before. But I think it will be cool to meet women who live in my area and have either lost a lot of weight, or are at the start of their journey.

Tom's wedding present

I'm 99% sure I am going to get boudoir photos done for Tom! I've always loved the idea...but haven't had the body or a reason to do it! Well, I found a great photographer who is running a special on July 17th and I think I will sign up! I'm so close to goal weight right now that I figure I have plenty of time to be ready in 5 months! I'm nervous, but also excited! I think it will be fun to have sexy pictures of me not only as a wedding gift for Tom, but it's something I want to do for me as well. Bring on the work outs! (and the Victoria's Secret catalog!) ;)

We are also toying with the idea on having the same photographer flown in for our wedding. It would end up being like $200 more than the Sandals photo package, but with WAY more coverage and a trash the dress session included too! We'll know more for sure next week once flights open up!