So I've mentioned before that I work in a cancer center. And every once in awhile there is a story that breaks your heart. Although this story is from Texas, it's about a little girl who only has weeks to live. Her dying wish? A wedding.
Read the story here.
Children do not deserve to have cancer ruin their lives like this...
***
Today I got a package in the mail. Inside was a few pairs of work pants, jeans, and shorts. All being one size too small. Am I crazy? Maybe. But I prefer to think of it as being optimistic. I want to be one size smaller by summer. All my old shorts no longer fit me because they are too big. And I just went and bought a bunch of new ones. So I will MAKE my ass fit into them no.matter.what. Extra motivation never hurt, right? (I had a 30% off coupon I had to use anyway...)
And in other boring news, we are having a few people over this Saturday for a poker/card/game night. And I have no idea what to make. I was thinking little finger food? Or something easy like pizza? I know I am making brownies, since I hate to see the mix go to waste, and I can't have brownies hanging around while I'm trying to fit into the above mentioned pants...but I can't only feed my guests brownies! I've searched some online sites for ideas but so far, no dice. (And it's a plus if they are sort-of healthy!)
And my car is in the shop. It needs a steering gear or something crazy? Basically it wasn't steering right and I figured that was kind of an important thing to fix...and I am very lucky my extended warranty covered all but $300 of it because the bill is coming close to $1600---which is about $1100 more than I have!!
I'm off to watch the Biggest Loser...
(And the bf caught me blogging. He said he is going to try and find my blog now. Let's hope he has better things to do. I don't want him reading my every thought! Go away, Tom!)
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Valentine's Day Re-cap
Let me start by saying I've always loved Valentine's day. I've only had one "bad" Valentine's day since I started dating when I was 14. And it was the year when the love of my life, live-in boyfriend was cheating on me. But other than that, they have all been pretty good. I know a lot of people don't see the point in this "Hallmark" holiday, but I see it as romantic!
Last Friday I got a dozen roses sent to me at work! I was pretty shocked because I was expecting some flowers at home bought from the grocery store. ;) So they put me in a good mood all day!
Then on Saturday we slept in and lounged around the house until 3:30 when we went out to dinner at Red Lobster. The lobster we had was so freaking delicious! It was some of the best lobster I've ever had! (the bf thought the same thing!) Which was weird since it was Valentine's day and they were super busy and it was only red Lobster. But anyway, it was SOOOOO good and we both left stuffed! Then we spent the rest of the night in bed with wine and a GIANT chocolate covered strawberry! :) (Oh yeah, I got some pretty emerald and diamond earrings too!) But seriously, the best part of the day was just cuddling in bed and reconnecting with each other. It was sappy and magical. :) I <3 Valentine's day!
I've decided to give myself 8 weeks to lose this final 10 pounds. So I started the couch-to-5k program. (I skipped the first couple weeks because they were too easy since I'm already a regular exerciser.) So my goal is to be 10 pounds lighter and to be able to run for 30 mins without stopping in 8 weeks. I got up before work to get the run/walk in today. And it felt damn good to have my workout over before I even got to work! It's hard to get up early, but I think it will be worth it in the end! Bikini, here I come!
Last Friday I got a dozen roses sent to me at work! I was pretty shocked because I was expecting some flowers at home bought from the grocery store. ;) So they put me in a good mood all day!
Then on Saturday we slept in and lounged around the house until 3:30 when we went out to dinner at Red Lobster. The lobster we had was so freaking delicious! It was some of the best lobster I've ever had! (the bf thought the same thing!) Which was weird since it was Valentine's day and they were super busy and it was only red Lobster. But anyway, it was SOOOOO good and we both left stuffed! Then we spent the rest of the night in bed with wine and a GIANT chocolate covered strawberry! :) (Oh yeah, I got some pretty emerald and diamond earrings too!) But seriously, the best part of the day was just cuddling in bed and reconnecting with each other. It was sappy and magical. :) I <3 Valentine's day!
I've decided to give myself 8 weeks to lose this final 10 pounds. So I started the couch-to-5k program. (I skipped the first couple weeks because they were too easy since I'm already a regular exerciser.) So my goal is to be 10 pounds lighter and to be able to run for 30 mins without stopping in 8 weeks. I got up before work to get the run/walk in today. And it felt damn good to have my workout over before I even got to work! It's hard to get up early, but I think it will be worth it in the end! Bikini, here I come!
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Uninspired
I'm feeling uninspired right now. I don't know what to write about. I've been tagged for this on Facebook, and I figured I could use it here. Maybe I will be inspired to write entire posts about some of these things...
25 Random things about me...
1. I should not be allowed to go to the animal shelter. I literally want to take them all home, and I would if I could!
2. I want a dalmatian puppy super bad. Even though I know they are a tough breed to own. I still want one. And It will be the first thing I buy for our home. (when we buy one next year!)
3. I have never done any illegal drugs.
4. I hate paying full-price for ANYTHING.
5. I've never met my dad. And I doubt I ever will.
6. I was sexually abused as a young teen by my step-grandpa.
7. If I could go back in time, I would. There are some things I would change.
8. I hate my job. I'm only there because I have bills to pay. It makes me very unhappy.
9. I'm 23 and still have no idea who I "really am."
10. I watch cheesy Lifetime movies on Sunday afternoons. (And I enjoy them!)
11. I can't sing. At all.
12. I hate running but I love how it makes me feel after I'm done.
13. I think I have sexy legs.
14. I love taking pictures...of everything!
15. I've never been on a plane. Ever.
16. I have never broken a bone, or had stitches, or had a surgery.
17. I want to have children, but I'm scared that I won't be a good mom.
18. I love ice cream
19. I love my family more than they know...
20. I like wine, but I never pay more than $10 a bottle.
21. I like spending time alone, and have to force myself to go out once in awhile.
22. I wish I could go back to school and study nutrition.
23. My boyfriend does more cleaning than I do most of the time. And I don't thank him enough.
24. My life is 1000000x better then it was 3 years ago. And I am very blessed.
25. I am very scared of death. I can't imagine anyone in my family dying, it freaks me out too much. I can't handle death.
25 Random things about me...
1. I should not be allowed to go to the animal shelter. I literally want to take them all home, and I would if I could!
2. I want a dalmatian puppy super bad. Even though I know they are a tough breed to own. I still want one. And It will be the first thing I buy for our home. (when we buy one next year!)
3. I have never done any illegal drugs.
4. I hate paying full-price for ANYTHING.
5. I've never met my dad. And I doubt I ever will.
6. I was sexually abused as a young teen by my step-grandpa.
7. If I could go back in time, I would. There are some things I would change.
8. I hate my job. I'm only there because I have bills to pay. It makes me very unhappy.
9. I'm 23 and still have no idea who I "really am."
10. I watch cheesy Lifetime movies on Sunday afternoons. (And I enjoy them!)
11. I can't sing. At all.
12. I hate running but I love how it makes me feel after I'm done.
13. I think I have sexy legs.
14. I love taking pictures...of everything!
15. I've never been on a plane. Ever.
16. I have never broken a bone, or had stitches, or had a surgery.
17. I want to have children, but I'm scared that I won't be a good mom.
18. I love ice cream
19. I love my family more than they know...
20. I like wine, but I never pay more than $10 a bottle.
21. I like spending time alone, and have to force myself to go out once in awhile.
22. I wish I could go back to school and study nutrition.
23. My boyfriend does more cleaning than I do most of the time. And I don't thank him enough.
24. My life is 1000000x better then it was 3 years ago. And I am very blessed.
25. I am very scared of death. I can't imagine anyone in my family dying, it freaks me out too much. I can't handle death.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Heat Wave!
It's been 35 degrees here the past few days. That is a tropical heat wave for Minnesota! I took my very first trip to Whole Foods yesterday, and most people were wearing only a sweatshirt--no jackets needed here when the temp gets above freezing!
We're all nuts.
I'm trying to eat healthier, so I decided I should check out Whole Foods. I've heard many good things about this place. My conclusion? It's just alright. I found a couple cool things, which I couldn't get at a regular grocery store. But I won't be doing the bulk of my shopping there. I'll go to get a few key items and that's about it...
To go along with my healthier lifestyle, I joined the 20SB Biggest Loser team! and I found out I am on the Green Team. I'm not sure exactly what the rules are, or what the challenges will be. But hopefully this is cool and at the very least helps give me some more motivation.
Time to watch some Lifetime movies until the Superbowl starts. (You know you secretly watch these on Sunday afternoons too! Don't kid!)
We're all nuts.
I'm trying to eat healthier, so I decided I should check out Whole Foods. I've heard many good things about this place. My conclusion? It's just alright. I found a couple cool things, which I couldn't get at a regular grocery store. But I won't be doing the bulk of my shopping there. I'll go to get a few key items and that's about it...
To go along with my healthier lifestyle, I joined the 20SB Biggest Loser team! and I found out I am on the Green Team. I'm not sure exactly what the rules are, or what the challenges will be. But hopefully this is cool and at the very least helps give me some more motivation.
Time to watch some Lifetime movies until the Superbowl starts. (You know you secretly watch these on Sunday afternoons too! Don't kid!)
Friday, January 30, 2009
Taxes
I filed my taxes today. I get a whopping $432 back. Good to know my hard earned money is going to pay the welfare for crack-whores and babies who have idiots for parents. (Instead of, you know, healthcare and education?!)
I know of one such person. She has 4 different children all with different dads. Oh yeah, she's only 25!! Anyway, she commented on my sister's Facebook page and asked her, and I QUOTE, "Can u do my taxes for me? and get all my reductions so i can get lots of money back? I wanna go shoppin."
WTF. Maybe you should buy your babies some clothes? Food? NO?
THEN GET YOUR DAMN TUBES TIED! (Or at least know that it is a tax deduction, sweetheart!)
I know another girl who couldn't pay her daycare for 2 months, and is ALWAYS behind on her bills. Where is her 5k tax return going? On a vacation to Vegas.
THINK PEOPLE, THINK!
And then there's me. I have no children out of wedlock. I am not on welfare. And I get $432 to put into my emergency savings. Oh yeah, after I buy two new tires which my car needs. Damn responsibilities!!!
***
I was IM'ing with my brother. He is starting a new school on Monday. I really hope he likes it there. He needs to make friends. He needs to build his future. And he needs to be happy and stay alive more than anything.
At the end of the conversation he told me he loved me.
I feel like I can do anything right now, I'm so happy. I needed to hear (read) that. So I'm off to the gym, and happy about it for once!!!
I know of one such person. She has 4 different children all with different dads. Oh yeah, she's only 25!! Anyway, she commented on my sister's Facebook page and asked her, and I QUOTE, "Can u do my taxes for me? and get all my reductions so i can get lots of money back? I wanna go shoppin."
WTF. Maybe you should buy your babies some clothes? Food? NO?
THEN GET YOUR DAMN TUBES TIED! (Or at least know that it is a tax deduction, sweetheart!)
I know another girl who couldn't pay her daycare for 2 months, and is ALWAYS behind on her bills. Where is her 5k tax return going? On a vacation to Vegas.
THINK PEOPLE, THINK!
And then there's me. I have no children out of wedlock. I am not on welfare. And I get $432 to put into my emergency savings. Oh yeah, after I buy two new tires which my car needs. Damn responsibilities!!!
***
I was IM'ing with my brother. He is starting a new school on Monday. I really hope he likes it there. He needs to make friends. He needs to build his future. And he needs to be happy and stay alive more than anything.
At the end of the conversation he told me he loved me.
I feel like I can do anything right now, I'm so happy. I needed to hear (read) that. So I'm off to the gym, and happy about it for once!!!
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Life as I see it...
Well, I guess life is back to "normal" around here. Ha.
My brother was in the hospital for a few days after his "incident." He came home after a few counseling sessions and said he was better. Nobody really believes him, but the doctors released him and we can't force him into therapy. I've talked to him a couple times this week and he does seem back to normal...but I won't believe it. This was the 3rd time within one year. I'm so tired of going to bed every night and wondering if I will get a call at 3am that my brother is gone for good. I can't deal with this anymore. He refuses to get help, he won't talk to any of us. There is nothing I can do. And that is really hard to swallow...
In other news, I bought a heart rate monitor, because I am a fat cow, and I hope it will help me push myself harder when I'm working out. Except getting in a great workout won't help me with the whole fat cow thing...I need to get my eating under control. The past week I've been averaging 1800 calories a day. Which isn't enough to make me gain any weight (I burn around 2100-2200 calories a day) but I'm not losing any weight either. I'm just so sick of being on a "diet." I can do 1800 calories, no problem. But I just can't seem to stick to 1300 calories anymore! I'm tired and hungry!!
I don't want to make excuses for myself. I know I can do this...I'm just having a REALLY hard time getting back on the wagon again. At least I've been keeping my weight the same, and I haven't been gaining any back. I wish I had someone doing this with me. The bf can eat and eat and LOSE weight. He does NOT exercise...at all. I wish a had a "buddy" IRL to help motivate me. *sigh*
Speaking of people trying to lose weight...I know this guy, we'll call him Fester. (Not his real name, thankfully!) Anyway, Fester used to work with my bf. We've hung out a few times and had a good time. There was/is some chemistry between us. But it's not like either of us would act on it. For one, he is friends with my bf. And two, even though there is some chemistry, I think we both know we would NOT work as an actual couple. So on Friday night we chatted on Facebook and he said that he was the DD for a few girls and wondered if I wanted to go with.
So I went out with him since I may be a little depressed right now and I wanted to get out of the house. We picked everyone up and went to a little bar and enjoyed a nice night out. The people were really nice. I wouldn't mind hanging out with them again.
I didn't get home until 4am. And my bf was royally pissed. And that made me happy. You see, he has NEVER been jealous before. And if he has, well, I've never seen it. It was nice to know that he actually cares about me and got a little jealous when I went out with someone else.
Getting back to the losing weight thing, Fester is trying to lose some weight/tone up. And I wish we could join a gym together or something. But I feel weird bringing it up, and I don't think my bf would like me spending an hour with this guy EVERY.SINGLE.DAY. Oh well.
....
...
..
.
I can't shake this funk I'm in. It sucks. I'm even thinking about trying St. John's Wort because I've heard it can help improve mild depression symptoms. (And I don't want to go on an actual anti-depressant...) But I don't know of anyone who's ever taken it before? (Case in point, it's 6:40pm right now and I am so tired I want to go to bed and sleep. I just want to feel normal again...)
My brother was in the hospital for a few days after his "incident." He came home after a few counseling sessions and said he was better. Nobody really believes him, but the doctors released him and we can't force him into therapy. I've talked to him a couple times this week and he does seem back to normal...but I won't believe it. This was the 3rd time within one year. I'm so tired of going to bed every night and wondering if I will get a call at 3am that my brother is gone for good. I can't deal with this anymore. He refuses to get help, he won't talk to any of us. There is nothing I can do. And that is really hard to swallow...
In other news, I bought a heart rate monitor, because I am a fat cow, and I hope it will help me push myself harder when I'm working out. Except getting in a great workout won't help me with the whole fat cow thing...I need to get my eating under control. The past week I've been averaging 1800 calories a day. Which isn't enough to make me gain any weight (I burn around 2100-2200 calories a day) but I'm not losing any weight either. I'm just so sick of being on a "diet." I can do 1800 calories, no problem. But I just can't seem to stick to 1300 calories anymore! I'm tired and hungry!!
I don't want to make excuses for myself. I know I can do this...I'm just having a REALLY hard time getting back on the wagon again. At least I've been keeping my weight the same, and I haven't been gaining any back. I wish I had someone doing this with me. The bf can eat and eat and LOSE weight. He does NOT exercise...at all. I wish a had a "buddy" IRL to help motivate me. *sigh*
Speaking of people trying to lose weight...I know this guy, we'll call him Fester. (Not his real name, thankfully!) Anyway, Fester used to work with my bf. We've hung out a few times and had a good time. There was/is some chemistry between us. But it's not like either of us would act on it. For one, he is friends with my bf. And two, even though there is some chemistry, I think we both know we would NOT work as an actual couple. So on Friday night we chatted on Facebook and he said that he was the DD for a few girls and wondered if I wanted to go with.
So I went out with him since I may be a little depressed right now and I wanted to get out of the house. We picked everyone up and went to a little bar and enjoyed a nice night out. The people were really nice. I wouldn't mind hanging out with them again.
I didn't get home until 4am. And my bf was royally pissed. And that made me happy. You see, he has NEVER been jealous before. And if he has, well, I've never seen it. It was nice to know that he actually cares about me and got a little jealous when I went out with someone else.
Getting back to the losing weight thing, Fester is trying to lose some weight/tone up. And I wish we could join a gym together or something. But I feel weird bringing it up, and I don't think my bf would like me spending an hour with this guy EVERY.SINGLE.DAY. Oh well.
....
...
..
.
I can't shake this funk I'm in. It sucks. I'm even thinking about trying St. John's Wort because I've heard it can help improve mild depression symptoms. (And I don't want to go on an actual anti-depressant...) But I don't know of anyone who's ever taken it before? (Case in point, it's 6:40pm right now and I am so tired I want to go to bed and sleep. I just want to feel normal again...)
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Interview
I got this interview from Elizabeth here.
The Rules:
1. If you want to participate, leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” (And your e-mail address, please.)
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
My Questions:
If you could be any animal, what would you be?
A tiger. I would be lean, I could run fast, and tons of animals would be scared of me. Not to mention, I would be very pretty. :)
What is your favorite thing to do when you have absolutely nothing to do?
Eat? Haha... I also like to read, take bubble baths and watch horrible reality TV.
What would the title of your biography be?
I wouldn't want to name it yet. It would say something like "broken & confused." I would like to hope that 10 or 20 years from now it would have a fabulous & witty title instead! We'll wait and see!
What celebrity, icon, political figure (living or dead) would you most want to have dinner with?
President Obama (how fitting, considering he got sworn in today!)
You're at a dinner with all your former lovers as the guest of honor. What do you toast to?
Oh wow! How awkward! I guess I would toast to great sex! All of the men in my past, even the ones who screwed me over, helped build my sexual confidence. And that's something I thankful for and damn proud of! ;)
The Rules:
1. If you want to participate, leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” (And your e-mail address, please.)
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
My Questions:
If you could be any animal, what would you be?
A tiger. I would be lean, I could run fast, and tons of animals would be scared of me. Not to mention, I would be very pretty. :)
What is your favorite thing to do when you have absolutely nothing to do?
Eat? Haha... I also like to read, take bubble baths and watch horrible reality TV.
What would the title of your biography be?
I wouldn't want to name it yet. It would say something like "broken & confused." I would like to hope that 10 or 20 years from now it would have a fabulous & witty title instead! We'll wait and see!
What celebrity, icon, political figure (living or dead) would you most want to have dinner with?
President Obama (how fitting, considering he got sworn in today!)
You're at a dinner with all your former lovers as the guest of honor. What do you toast to?
Oh wow! How awkward! I guess I would toast to great sex! All of the men in my past, even the ones who screwed me over, helped build my sexual confidence. And that's something I thankful for and damn proud of! ;)
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